Does anyone else out there struggle with thinking they are super human? That somehow the things others face, elude you; natural challenges and difficulties can somehow be overcome with super-human strength and you are unaffected by the strenuous seasons of life that others get bogged down in?

Since we have moved internationally more times than I can count, I somehow think we will breeze right through it. Hey, we are pretty good sorters and packers, we have pared down our stuff to medium- minimal.....And this time we have even moved back into the same well-known house in Northern California where we have lived during other home assignments and we don't have any kids to settle into new schools, it's just the 2 of us cruising along. I mean, what's the big deal?  

Then we wake up and realize we are just like everyone else. And "transition tiredness" hits us hard too. We stumble around in a fog upon arival; steering clear of overwhelming places like Wal-Mart and the bread isle at the grocery store. Too many choices and our brains are tired from so many recent decisions; What clothes to pack in our suitcase to go to the States for 1 year? Which cupboard to put our dishes in? What car and used furniture to purchase? What trips to plan?  Do we really need that new towel for the next 9 months or can we get by with the ones we have.....

I think you get the picture.

Besides feeling physically tired, our brains and hearts are tired too. Saying "goodbye" to one world and saying "hello" to our other world is strange. I am happy and sad at the same time. I am missing roles and structure but also feel relieved that rest and lack-of-pressure greet me. There are moments I feel comfortable and "at home" but then surprisingly just a few minutes later I will feel out of place and wonder how long it will take to be and feel settled. The discouraging answer is always: Probably just about the time we start to pack to leave again. 

As you can see, I am definitely not super-human. I am weak and struggle along. I am normal. As I have helped others to realize, I too have to remind myself there are ups and downs to this fatiguing missionary transition process.  There are days where it is exciting and enjoyable and other days where I feel I can't take it any more and I am ready to through in the towel (you know, the new towel I just finally decided to purchase at Walmart).  I need to give myself time to acclimate and I need to let this transition soak up all my extra energy. And most of all, I need to give myself grace and be patience as we adjust to our new, but-not-so-new, life on this side of the ocean.