I hum as it plays through my head,  "I'll be Home for Christmas".  I smile as I realize I will get to see all my kids in December this year. 

A flight to America gave me the chance to hold my new grand-baby and connect to my son and his wife who are now parents, capably caring for their little one through sleepless nights and diaper-filled days. 

This little addition to our family is so loved and blessed. I was happy to pile on a little extra love with lots of cuddles. He might not remember those moments, but I sure will. And they will play over and over in my head and in my heart.

And then back on this side of the ocean, a son arrived last week. And another son arrives tomorrow, this time with a fiancé on his arm. These as-tall-as-their-daddy boys barely squeeze into our cozy apartment. And their appetites eat up homemade cookies and longed-for Japanese food. Navigating crowded trains and sushi shops, gobbling down rice balls and siping barley tea. Even though we are in a different city and a different house, Japan feels familiar and they feel they are "home". 

As wonderful as it is to be with family and as much I love my kids to be home for Christmas, I realize my heart gets sidetracked easily. Christmas is not about sentimental decorations or fanciful food. It's not about creating a mood or getting a feeling. And, it's not about family. 

Instead, Christmas is about Jesus. 

Jesus lights up my darkness and rescues me from wrath. Jesus gives peace to my relationships when I struggle to get along. Jesus brings forgiveness to brokeness. Jesus calms and comforts through restless nights and dreary days. Jesus renews my strength and is my harbor of hope. 

Even if I didn't have anything else, even if I didn't have family,  I would have Jesus. And He is all I need. 

So whether my family is near or far. Whether I've just enjoyed a visit or have one to look forward to, I will celebrate Jesus this Christmas. He is Emmanuel, God with me. I don't have to wait for Him to visit or be sad when He leaves. My hope in Him is never disappointed. He is the one I will hum and the One who fills my heart with song.