Even though our hearts were broken by our sad goodbyes, there was one special blessing that God gave us to look forward to..that was looking forward to living with our oldest son for the next 4 years.For his 3 years of middle school he has been living at the dorm of a Christian English speaking school in Tokyo. It was one of the hardest decisions in our lives, but to obediently follow God's clear leading, we chose the best place for him educationally and socially at this stage in his life. God had led our family to continue working at the Lighthouse Church in Northern Japan (1 and 1/2 hour plane flight from Tokyo). We cried and prayed for several years, wrestling before God about this next step. God, who had entrusted this son to us 11 years before as a little baby, was now asking us to entrust him back into God's care for these few years to be at school away from us.
The way God led us was not easily understood by others, especially in America who might not understand the logistics of trying to educate missionary kids oversees. It was often easier for us to say nothing at all, than try to emotionally explain how God had led us. We have endured criticism and judgemental comments with hurting hearts; yet God has taught us through this that we obey Him, and Him alone, no matter what others say.
We were blessed to be able to see our oldest son almost every month. I wrote him postcards often and we talked on our cell phones daily. God allowed him to do thrive and blossom in his school enviroment, even though there were hard times of learning responsibility that most kids don't have to tackle until they are in college. God also gave him many great role models and big "brothers" and "sisters" at the dorm. I am sure he will adjust much easier to US high school and college life because of being in this great English-Christian school for jr. high.
Don't worry, I am not advocating "boarding school" for every child...each child is different with their distinct personalities and abilities. In fact, the main reason we are relocating to Tokyo is so that our 3 boys can go to this school. We think that 1 of our kids wouldn't settle well with all the transitions that our oldest took in stride. The dorm at the school is actually closing since less and less students are boarding. I think we are at the end of an era where "boarding" was the only and expected way to school missionary kids; although to many missionaries it is still the only way their kids can get the needed English education and social imput that they desperately need.
Thank you for reading this honest testimony of our struggles and experience. I hope I have communicated this in a God honoring and appropriate way. It has been on my heart for some time to try and share this well with others.
God has taught be a lot through this. One hard lesson is to not judge others. I often don't understand God's private leading in their lives. He has also given me a heart for struggling, lonely missionary families trying to educate their complicated little ones well without a support network of English Sunday school, church youth group, English libraries, home schooling co-ops, etc. Through these hard years I have realized that that unfortunatly our dear, faithful supporters in the States really don't understand all the bumps and bruises along the road that many missionaries hit as they try to care for thier families overseas.
(my 14 year old -too grown up- pictured with me at the middle school graduation)
